Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Labor Day Adventures or...Welcome to Crazy Town!

Ah Labor Day...a day off from work and 24 hours to do nothing. Or to do 412 things. One of those. Let me share, won't you?


I woke up somewhere around 3 am STARVING - my own fault since I hadn't eaten dinner the night before; there was no getting out of it. I had to have food. So, I schlepped down the stairs and started looking through my fridge and pantry to find exactly what I expected to find, a big fat nothing. Why I didn't open the freezer and dig into the cookie dough ice cream I will never know, but, I decided to make noodles. So yeah, at approximately 3:30 am I ate some bow tie pasta with salt and butter. And I had a Coke. Because that seemed like the smart thing to do at that hour. While I ate I watched my DVR recording of Drop Dead Diva, which kept me up until almost 4:30. It seemed ridiculous to stay up at that hour on a holiday so I came back upstairs and crawled in bed where I was still wide awake. I fell back asleep somewhere around 6 for a couple of hours - early morning nap? - and finally was awake for good around 8 am.

I spent the next 4ish hours sitting in bed doing absolutely nothing of importance online. I tweeted, I facebooked, I tumblr'd; I probably even emailed (yeah, I'm old school like that sometimes). It was all very exciting and a definite time waster, though I'm still not clear how I wasted 4 hours, but suddenly, it was almost 12:30 and I was meeting a friend around 1:15 so I got up and got myself ready to go. Half the day had been spent in a mostly slothful state and I was pleased.

I was happy to see the sunshine when I finally stepped out of my house and made my way to the light rail station, and I was definitely happy to see my friend when she pulled into the parking lot moments after I did. I had apparently read the light rail schedule incorrectly and we had to wait a little longer than planned, but we didn't care; we had a lot of terribly important things to discuss.

While we were waiting a lady asked us where a park was and we actually knew, so we gave her directions, which she proceeded to give to a young kid on a bike, but it was clear she wasn't sure, so we reiterated them to him. He thanked us and rode off and then the lady asked me about restaurants in the area and a few other things then drifted off to meet her own friend. We felt very helpful and useful and were ready to embark on our journey.

I was surprised how busy the light rail was for a holiday, but the ride to downtown San Jose was pretty uneventful. We journeyed to The Kebab Shack for a late lunch and found a perfect table outside while we waited for our food. That's when the children invaded. Two of them to be exact. They came from another table, and their parents just let them cross the sidewalk and wander into our territory. It was not cool. We thought both parents were ignoring them but then realized the dad was tending to yet a third child while the mom lollygagged somewhere. This went on for about ten minutes but then she finally corralled them back into her land and we were back at peace. That's when the wind shifted and we got a big whiff of the garbage bin sitting in the street. We very nearly hurled, but then it shifted again and it went away. It came back once more but it wasn't as bad so we endured. Then the car alarm came. And I'm not even sure where the car was, but I was ready to punch it in the face! It rang until it could ring no more, and then we let out our breath and enjoyed the 12 seconds of silence until it started ringing again. This happened four more times. Seriously. And then there was a hideously loud beeping from across the street that started up. It was like a battle of the annoying noises and we were about to lose our minds but somehow we managed to contain our rage and finish eating without incident.

Getting our movie tickets was easy and the guy inside the booth was actually entertaining so we entertained him right back. We're funny, my friend and I. At least we think so. We made a stop in the bathroom before procuring our popcorn and while it wasn't really a big deal, in the grand scheme of things, the paper towel dispenser actually played an entertaining role. My friend washed her hands first and realized that the main dispenser, in the most convenient part of the bathroom, wasn't working. She reached over to the inconvenient one in the corner and pulled her towels out. I followed suit having seen her, but then another girl tried the other one, to no avail naturally, and looked confused as she reached for the other one. We were like, "Really? You didn't see us both use that one? Really?" We left her there to fend for herself and made our way to the treat counter where we, surprisingly, procured treats without any drama.

We weren't expecting to see many people in the theatre, but there were actually quite a few, so we found some seats and got settled with our food and waited for things to start. Naturally a ridiculously loud popcorn chomper sat behind us, but he calmed down when the movie started. We were definitely entertained by 30 Minutes or Less. It was a little raunchy and a lot of crazy and we laughed a lot. From the pen gun, to the Satanic Hispanic to Sandra; it was absolutely fun.

We had to wait almost 25 minutes for the light rail to fetch us, but it wasn't too bad. Downtown San Jose is entertaining on a holiday Monday evening, and we didn't want for people to watch. From baggy jeans to big plugs in ears to the guy I'm pretty sure is stalking me on the light rail every day, it was an adventure. Okay, I don't really think the guy is stalking me but I have seriously seen him every day on the light rail since school started. He gets on at the same stop I do and is almost always on the same train to and from downtown. It's a little crazy.

Once we got on the light rail the fun continued. We sat in the back so we could see pretty much everything happening in the whole car and almost died laughing when a guy spied another guy and thought he knew him. He pretended to run into him then laughed, but the guy he bumped was not laughing. The bumper was like, "Hey, it's me." And then he realized it wasn't actually the person he thought it was. And he was embarrassed and came and sat in the furthest back seat. We died. I seriously thought there was going to be a brawl because I could only see part of the action - my friend filled me in on the rest after the fact. I was trying to figure out how we could get off the train so as not to get involved in any fisticuff action. Yep. I just wrote fisticuff.

From there we ventured back to my house and had a calm couple of hours watching a chick flick. We needed some mellow after our adventures. But then I got hungry and was determined to eat dinner so as not to have a repeat of the earlier happenings where I was starving in the middle of the night. So, we went to Outback. You KNOW how I hate Outback.

We got seated in one of those giant booths you could actually sleep in, and I was tempted to lay down for a minute, not because I was tired, but just because it was there. I refrained though and sat up like a grown person and read the menu as though I had no idea what was on it. Our waiter, let's call him Ephraim, since that was his name, was very peppy and energetic and it was bordering on annoying, but we just went with it since we were being rather silly and had a lot of our own energy to burn. He took our drink orders and promised us bread. Oh the bread. Keep that in mind. It will be important later. We got our drinks and our bread and placed the rest of our order and moved on.

Every time Ephraim came to our table he had even more energy than the last time and it was a little bit creepy at times how excited he was to talk to us. At one point he even told me how he ate his shrimp like me, saving the last bite until the end and how after I'd ordered it he decided that's what he was going to eat when he closed up. Sure. Okay. TMI? Maybe a little. He also told us that he'd watched a lot of people eating and pretended to hide behind the booth behind us and pop up like he was spying. What? I believe he thought he was funny, but it became creepier by the second and we were trying not to laugh. He was nice, and our orders were right, but it was too much. TOO MUCH I SAY!

Because I am a frequent Outbacker I do know a few of the peeps that work there, and when I saw my friend Andrew on the other side of the restaurant I tried to get his attention but I failed miserably. When he finally wandered to our side Ephraim (EPHRAIM!) was at our table telling us one of his tales and I couldn't actually see around him to get Andrew's attention. When Ephraim finally left, Andrew was gone too and I was bothered. But Andrew came back and I called him over and as he leaned into the booth to hug me I managed to knock over what was left of my ginormous iced tea. Still not quite sure how that happened, but Andrew was kind enough to clean it up while only slightly mocking me. He took the bread that got destroyed by the tea and said he'd bring us more with a new glass of tea for me, which he did in just a couple of minutes. He also told me I was cut off if I spilled that one then sat down and chatted with us for a bit. Clearly this bothered Ephraim because he came right back over and tried to jump into our conversation. Jealous much?

Andrew got back to work and Ephraim went back to his normal self, I guess, and I drank more of my tea and ate a little bread then settled into a complete coma. We got the bill, put our cards in the holder and waited for Ephraim to swing back by, which of course he did very soon after. He got things taken care of but we sat and chatted a while longer, laughing at our day and how crazy things turn when we're together. We decided we were ready to go, but I wanted to take the remaining bread with me since I'd only eaten one piece, but Ephraim was nowhere to be found and so, we waited. When he finally stopped by and I asked him for a bag he was like, "No, I'm just going to throw this bread away." And I was thinking, "What? But I actually want it." Then he added, "I'll get you a fresh loaf; this one's all dry." Well okay. That was nice. So we let him take the supposedly dry bread and waited again. And waited. And then we waited some more. And finally, after almost 15 minutes and no bread, we left. I should have just put the partially eaten loaf in my purse and gone with it.

Andrew told us goodbye as we left and we just shook our heads as we got to the car. I don't live in Campbell. I live in CrazyTown! And I didn't even have time to tell you about the table behind us and their crazy dining situation...maybe I'll share that later...but for now, I think I've shared quite enough.

Hope you had a great day off...we sure did!!